A Slightly Belated Valentine’s Day Post

I’m back, bitches!

Sorry for the profanity. I just felt like adding “bitches” to the sentence would add more punch to it, so to speak. Anywho, I was recently nominated for two valentine’s day-themed awards, and while admittedly it’s no longer Valentine’s day, it’s still never too late to talk about the romance. (Ladies?)

So thank you, Engie, for nominating me. Oh, and thank you for that eCard thingy you sent me a few weeks back, which I will not reveal to the readers for sole purpose of being coy. You have no idea how happy that made me.

To start off with the first award, the Be My Valentine Book Tag:

Who is your favorite couple in a book?

Gregor and Luxa from the Underland Chronicles. They were adorable, in a slightly painful-to-watch sort of way.

Which book character would you take to dinner if you could?

As in, a date? Because I ain’t paying no check. And I’d feel bad if she had to pay for the whole thing, so I’d have to pick a character willing to dine and dash. Therefore, I pick Cameron Post, because she’s not likely to be fussy about taking things without paying.

Of course, it’s very, very unlikely that Cam (can I call her Cam?) would be interested in me. (Read the book, people!) So instead I’ll go with Blue Sargent, from The Raven Cycle. I feel like the two of us would get along well. We both similar senses of humor, sort of.

Villains deserve a little love, too. Which villain would you give a box of chocolates to?

Hm, could I pick Fiona from my own story, More Than I Can Chew? Because sure, she sort of ruined everything for everyone, but she still had one hell of a rough day.

No, Matt. You can’t choose your own character, you obnoxious egomaniac.

Fine then. I choose Daenerys Targaryen, who could be considered a villain, depending on who you ask. She’d probably be all, “What’s this?” And I’d say, “It’s chocolate,” and she’d say, “What in the seven hells is chocolate?” And then I’d have to explain the whole concept and manage to convince her it’s not poison. Hopefully she’d find the chocolate so delicious that she decides to stop pursuing the iron throne to start a chocolate milk factory, giving her army and dragons to me instead.

Be a Matchmaker; pick two characters from two different stories and pair them up.

Samantha Black Crow (American Gods) with an adult Cameron Post (Miseducation of Cameron Post). I just figured, they’re both really cool characters, so if they get together they’d be twice as cool.

What book setting would you like to visit while on a date?

Dorne, from A Song of Ice and Fire. As of the latest book, it’s easily the most peaceful and most tolerant of the seven kingdoms. Not to mention, with winter coming, I’d want to be as far south as possible. Those white walkers, am I right?

It’s not all about romance. What’s your favorite non-romantic relationship in a novel?

Paul Sheldon and Annie Wilkes. (I feel like I’m going about this question the wrong way . . .)

Venturing out of the book sphere for a bit: What song makes you feel loved?

“I Got You Babe,” by Etta James. This song wouldn’t be nearly as great if I didn’t connect it with this scene from The Last of Us:

Who is your favorite couple in a movie/TV show?

Frank and Claire Underwood from House of Cards. They’re both terrible people, but as a couple they are very unique, not to mention powerful. And neither of them seem to have any qualms about a spontaneous three-way with their security guard, which is pretty cool.

Now for the most important question of all: What is your favorite shade of red?

Blue. Because fuck you, that’s why.

(Just so you all know, I’ve spent the last few days finishing the final season of The Wire, which may cause an increase in colorful language.)

And now for the second tag:

Favorite couple ever? You want to have their relationship.

Eleanor and Park, because they fit together, like milk and cookies, or handstands and foot rubs.

Relationship that never happened? You wanted them to get together, but they never did.

Two certain characters from The Book Thief. I will not say more for spoilers’ sake, and because after three years I still find it a bit tough to talk about. #brokenheartsstaybroken.

Your bookish crush?

Hmm… I’m a huge fan of post-AGOT Sansa Stark, and am a huge fan of her from ASOS on.

Favorite “feel good” romance?

By this, do you mean a romance book with a happy ending? Because all the love stories I read tend to be tragedies. I guess I’d have to go with Paper Towns, where the romance was probably the least “feel good” part of the novel. Margo was sort of kind of a little bit of a terrible, terrible person, and Quentin was unhealthily obsessed with her. But hey, they were adorable as kids together.

(I think I’m going to write a “In Defense of Paper Towns” post one day, because lately I’ve been seeing a lot of criticisms of that book. And while everyone’s entitled to their opinions and whatnot, I do feel like some people are kind of… missing the point. Will discuss later. Possibly.)

Favorite genre to add romance to?

I don’t know. Urban fantasy? I say this because The Raven Cycle is the only urban fantasy series I think I’ve read, and the romance was great, and no one can say otherwise.

And that is all for questions. I refuse to nominate anyone because Valentine’s Day has come and past. Also, Valentine’s is a pretty stupid holiday anyway, essentially a Scam created by Evil Corporations so we’d Spend Money, or at least that’s I hear from a couple billion or so people each year.

To end this post, here’s a picture of two giraffes in love.

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