I haven’t posted a post in a while and I have no idea of what to post either, so I decided to give you twenty random facts about me that’ll probably be featured in future history books, because I’m just that important.
Also I just chugged down a can of red bull so I’m probably going to switch from topic to topic. Also be prepared for inappropriate outbursts that have absolutely nothing to do with this post.
Shall we begin?
- I hope no one was offended with the statement two lines above this one. If anyone is, please know that it’s only a body part and it’s nothing controversial. Now, if I had described the body part, then you might have a reason to be offended.
- Speaking of lions, I am friends with Aslan. Aslan and I sometimes like to drive around the ghetto and beat up anyone who looks at us funny. We’re mad tight.
- My eyes are blue, like the sky.
- Just to make things clear, I mean my eyes are like the sky on a clear day. Not a day with clouds or anything.
- I have this amazing idea for a prank I want to do on someone: I’m going to buy a whole bunch of cups and sneak into someone’s room while they’re sleeping. Then I’m going to fill each cup to the top with water and place them all an inch away from each other so the whole floor is covered in water filled cups. But here’s the kicker: Before I fill all the cups up, I put the alarm clock on the exact opposite side of the room as the person sleeping and set it two or three hours earlier than usual. Now he/she won’t be able to get up to turn on the alarm clock without spilling water all over his floor. I know, I’m evil.
- The above plan is actually used in the novel I’m working on. Intrigued? Good.
- I don’t get why some adults get all uptight about swearing in YA literature, yet none of them seem to get uptight about kids being forced to kill other children like in The Hunger Games. These people need to get their priorities straight.
- For the record I don’t think anyone should be getting all uptight about The Hunger Games, either, because it sends a positive message. It shouldn’t matter if a YA book has swearing, sex or killing, as long as the overall message is positive.
- I’ve recently started watching Doctor Who, and I must say, I love this show. It started off cheesy, but then after a few episodes it stopped being cheesy and started being awesome instead. This show is like cocaine to me, assuming that cocaine is fun to watch and very thought-provoking.
- Although I liked the 9th Doctor, I think I prefer the Tenth Doctor so far. Also, Rose is as hot as the sun. Not literally though, because the sun is like ten thousand degrees and if she was that hot she would die.
- Is the phrase “Swift like Taylor” a common one? It really should be. If it isn’t, please start saying it, giving full credit to me, of course.
- I’ve recently gained a new-found respect for Suzanne Collins. She actually made me feel sad when a cockroach died. I will always remember you, Tick.
- The other day I decided to write an inspirational quote in my school’s bathroom stall. It’s a great change from the usual crude drawings of male reproductive organs and sayings such as, “_____’s a faggot!” and “Freshmen suck!”
- The quote I wrote was “Action may not always bring happiness; but there is no happiness without action.”-Benjamin Disraeli. When I came back to that stall the next day, I found that I had started a whole conversation written on the stall. Two kids called me a faggot, which is to be expected from not-very-smart adolescent males, but two other kids wrote kind words. The first one said, “That was so f*cking deep.” The second one said, (responding to the first comment), “I know right? I kind of want to turn my life around now. “
- Speaking of Freshmen, I don’t get the random hatred of them. Is it because the upperclassmen are jealous of the fact that we’re freaky fresh? Yes, that must be it.
- I’m going on a ski trip tomorrow. I have to wake up at four in the morning, which sucks. On the bright side, I get to go snowboarding and eat delicious waffles.
- Taylor Swift sings about the same thing in every song, but I still love all of her songs.
- Do all teenagers dance inappropriately at dances? Or is my school just exclusively slutty? I hope it’s the latter, because then I would have to give up on life.
- I’m thinking about auditioning to play the next Doctor on Doctor Who. The only problem is, I’d have to fake a British accent, and I’m not very good at it at all. Whenever I try, everyone within twenty miles of me cringes uncontrollably and then kills their firstborn child.
- I wrote this post in only twenty minutes, which I think is some type of record for me.
You now know everything there is to know about me, kind of.
I’m sorry for this god-awful post. Maybe it’s not that bad and I’m being too hard on myself. After all, I just crashed from the Red Bull and am suddenly feeling tired and depressed. Goodnight.